Haha Im feeling a little sadistic right now, at 2:47 in the morning, unable to sleep as I run the past over and over in my head. I know I should have let the bitterness go by now, but I cant help Wondering how much I have changed over the past few years, after those closest to me betrayed me. (Not Raye...<3...Shes my bff).
Looking out at the moon, it makes me want to cry for its beauty and its pain, being all alone out there, with only the stars as company. I cant help but feel the same at times, like the moon and I are kindred souls. (haha I guess the nickname Serena fits -sailor moon-)
Im feeling better about there being men in my life again, starting to feel as if I can start to trust a few, though after men like those of my past, I wonder if all men will someday turn corrupt. Or if it happens to be only those that live in florida, wanting to live the ghetto thug life. Wanting only to drink, get high, and party, treating women like trash. I still after 2 years cant help but flinch at times, when guys I know would never hurt me moves to fast.
My mom found out recently, though a friend of mine Slipping up at work, oh I wanted to kill KT. I have never been so mad in my life at someone, it mad me sick when my mother asked me for details, and I wouldn't give them to her, not wanting to dredge up the past before my eyes, making the cuts run anew. I find I like it much better to try and surpress them.
Though it seems to be looking up, I've started making really awesome friends in the last few weeks, which is freaking great. I thank you all,
Jordan- the sweet, tempramental guy, that has his rough around the edges moments, but its part of your charm, Who even when Miffed at me, still checks to see if Im alright ^.^..... (you big tease) lol.....
Matt- the gentle military man (who would rather just be taken as a man, than an army man). The caring, watch man..as I see him.
Lycan-My kin, my brother in crime, so it seems, we are similar in our pasts, though I did look back at my parents in longing, where you never did and...
Bradley- the gentle bear, who opened my eyes to what was going on around me, and your loyalty to one, who you knew so little about, but protected, and sheltered through a rough time in life your all showing me that men can be nice, and that is a big step.
Tryyani finally hit 70 ^.^ WoW is my addiction, my home away from home, when I need a break from reality, shes Amazing my smexy night elf hunter. Well I must say sorry to someone >.< this was kinda a sad blog, but kinda a nice one too ^.^
1 comments:
This makes me sad. I had my blog hours and hours before you had yours and mine still looks like crap. -whine- Actually you can snag Matt's blog link off the right side of mine. Make sure ya link him your's!
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